About Us

You pour, we judge!

The perfect cuppa does not exi…

We are two snobby coffee assholes on an equally pretentious mission to locate the perfect latte.

We share 50% of our DNA, and besides whatever gene makes both of our left sternoclavicular joints slightly sharper than the right, one of the most important genes my father passed onto me is a section of DNA known as the Pompous Coffee Gene. This powerful stretch of genetic material has predisposed the both of us to have incredibly high standards when it comes to Lattes. Thanks for reading!

All that we ever ask of you is:

Coffee Bean

Best Beans

If you don’t have the best beans one can find, don’t bother making coffee¬†

Coffee Bean

Quality Milk

It has got to be the perfect temperature, and the perfect froth.

Coffee Bean

Perfect Blend

Only OGs know how its done, and only they deserve a decent rating.